All the bar people think X is a jerk. The only people who like him are your church friends.
Sometimes people just don’t realize what they’ve said, do they?
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I’m not the most liberated woman you’ve met. Yes, I believe we should be paid equally on the job, but when it comes to male-female interactions, well…for every woman who feels she gives more, there is a man who feels the exact same way. We just don’t understand each other.
I’ve come to believe that understanding is overrated, anyway. It’s acceptance that we truly desire. Acceptance of who we really are. Of course, we should be able to accept ourselves, but it’s so nice when someone else helps us out.
I think that’s why rejection (or the perception of rejection) stings: We show someone our true selves and are deemed unacceptable. If only we could quickly understand the other person does not accept him-/herself, we could spend a lot less time drinking. OF COURSE a person who doesn’t accept themselves will freak out when someone else does.
Yes, I’m completely traumatized. But I am surrounded by such beauty in the midst of the detritus of transformation.
And, when you get right down to it, forgiving other people is not really about them: It’s about forgiving ourselves. The other person is a projection of ourselves.
On the one hand, it’s disheartening the number of opportunities I give myself to practice self-forgiveness.
On the other hand, practice does make perfect.
I hope.
"I’ve come to believe that understanding is overrated, anyway. It’s acceptance that we truly desire."
ReplyDeleteThis is pretty meaningful for me today. Try as we might, we'll never understand everyone (or, some days, ANYONE).
On a completely unrelated note, we half-seriously discussed packing up and moving to your state today. Rumor has it there is actual culture, decent education, and a fabulous bookstore...and GREEN, that color we don't have here. We get this way every summer...
This may sound like an odd statement, especially coming from me, but, here goes. Sometimes we just have to live. Acceptance, rejection, and understanding are just part of living. They play a role in every relationship, whether with others or ourselves, and teach us who we are and who we want to be. But, sometimes, really we just have to live to see where life is taking us. Because sometimes no matter how much we analyze ourselves and/or others, living is the only way to find a real answer. Just sayin! (BTW, lovely post.)
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